Real Love

The Bible is one of those challenging tombs - where we'll decide that it's good and right. We'll declare that we're going to follow it. There'll be things that we underline and say "Amen!" to. We totally agree with them. They epitomize righteousness.

And then we stumble across another Scripture that will simply force us into a reconciliation process. Scripture never contradicts itself. Ironically, Scripture never allows true followers of God to contradict themselves either! Instead, Scripture will force us to reconcile our beliefs and our behaviors, one by one.

1 Corinthians 13 and 1 John 3 are two such pieces of Scripture. These two chapters are replete with definitions of love. Most of us are familiar with 1 Corinthians 13. It's the stuff of greeting cards and wedding vows and wall plaques. "Love is patient, love is kind ... it keeps no record of wrongs. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes and always perseveres."

Did you catch that? It "keeps no record of wrongs." How many of us can say we do that? Christianity is a religion of the heart. But bitterness against someone who has wronged you is an evil cancer within you. It will eventually destroy you. If we're honest, most of us have some bitter cancers that still need to be dealt with.

I've blogged about forgiveness in the past. It is a continuing decision and action. Sometimes it requires the power of the Holy Spirit in order to accomplish it. I can think I've totally forgiven someone - and then unforgiveness will come creeping back into my mind (and heart) when I least expect it. And there is the cancer of bitterness, resentment, anger, frustration and all those other negative feelings - right back in my lap again!

1 John 3 tells us that those who are truly in Christ Jesus (and I'm paraphrasing here) - who truly do belong to the Lord, will love one another not with words or feelings - but with actions and in truth. Jesus taught that whoever hates another person is a murderer at heart (Matthew 5:21-22). In other words, my contempt for someone who has wronged me or of whom I disapprove overwhelms whatever love I may think I have for them. Simply put, it is not possible to love someone and hold them in contempt at the same time. One will cancel out the other.

Too often we'll live in denial, telling yourself that we love someone. At the same time we'll tell ourselves that we're Christ-followers. But God's Word is the truth. And the truth says that if we don't have loving actions toward others, the love of Christ simply isn't in us.

Like I said, Scripture demands that we reconcile our opposing beliefs and behaviors.

Love & Hate

Hate and love have become overused words in today's society. They really are tantamount to cliches - tossed carelessly at objects, situations and of course, people. The cause use of such words as love and hate have emptied them of their meaning. We no longer can comprehend either love or hate.

The Bible tells us emphatically that God hates sin - but loves us.

Can any of us really even begin to fathom what it means that God hates sin? Let's think about that. He hates sin so much that He is willing to destroy the world and all of humanity to get rid of it. He hates sin so much that He is willing to destroy all that He created in order to get rid of it. He hates sin so much that He is willing to sacrifice His most precious love in order to defeat it. Who among us has ever known such a hate as this?

So God loves us. For most of us that concept is one of the most difficult to embrace. (I know it was for me.) I spent most of my life believing that I was not lovable ... even by God. It took quite a bit of work for God to convince me that He really does love me. And to be honest, I am still learning exactly what that means. God's love for me is a truth I now acknowledge. But I have no idea how I could ever explain it to anyone. He loves me so much that He is willing to reach into the pit of hell to pull me out. And here's one for you - He loves me so much that He is willing to forgive me - of absolutely everything I've ever done or ever will do!

The irony is that for humans, it is impossible to love someone without getting something back. Consider that we love our children. But they give us something back. We love our pets - and they give us something back. In fact, no matter who or what we love in our humanity, we get something back. But God's love is only one sided. There is nothing we can give to God. And yet His love is stronger than any love humanity has ever known. Who among us could ever comprehend love such as that?

So what does it mean when someone says, "I hate to wait." or "I love ice cream." How should we understand such contexts of hate or love - against a back drop of hate and love in God's eyes? What does it mean when a pop singer exclaims how much they love their adoring fans? Obviously, these tend to be rhetorical questions for which there are no satisfying answers.

The simple answer is that we are like stupid sheep and have no concept of what love and hate really are. But we sling those words around as if they meant something. I read in Romans 5 not long ago that those who aren't Christ-followers are considered to be "enemies of God." (That was a sobering reality!)

A woman (named Mary Hawkins) has been quoted as having said, "The opposite of love is not hate; it is apathy." I think she may be right. You see, hate implies that you care enough to think about a person. You mull things over in your mind. Even if you disapprove of them, there is some sort of attraction there. (Taming of the Shrew anyone?) But apathy means no thoughts, nothingness, no energy devoted to that individual whatsoever. Apathy towards someone would be worse than hatred; it would mean a cold heart. Apathy is truer rejection then hate could ever hope to be.

So what then do we do with love and hate? Perhaps, my friends, we would do well to look at God's definitions of love and hate. We should maybe consider what Jesus has to say about being lukewarm ... toward Him or toward others. It is clear that humans, and especially Christians, have some stepping up to the plate to do here.

We are missing the mark in our love. And maybe even more importantly, we are missing the mark on hatred as well.