Adult Children

It has been said that our sin grieves the Holy Spirit. I take that to mean that God is saddened when He considers the fallen condition of His children. He is disheartened when He looks at the mistakes we make. Before God destroyed the world in the great flood, He said He was sorry He had made those children. They were so rebellious and sinful that God was sorry He'd had children!

Now it is interesting to observe the similarities between God's experience with His children - and our experience with our earthly children. Whether you gave birth to them or adopted them, your children have the potential to make you proud. They have the potential to live your values and honor you with their lives. Or not.

I've looked at some of the most notorious murderers in society (like Jeffrey Damler) - and wondered how on earth their parents can cope with such pain. To have a son or daughter grow up to be a heinous evil in society must be one of the most painful things life can offer anyone. I can't even begin to imagine it. But I think I can get a clue.

There seem to be at least two sets of children that grow up in American culture.

A guy I work with has one set. One of his daughters is a doctor, married to a doctor. His other daughter is a lawyer, married to a scientist. The doctor and her husband take mission trips to third-world countries and work like dogs to take care of the grandchild. This guy and his wife are very proud of their adult children. I would be too.

Another guy I work with has another set of children. One of his daughters is married to a guy who's a registered sex offender. She works menial labor jobs, part time with no benefits. She's often laid off or fired because she misses too much work. Typically she misses work to visit her husband in prison. His son is a drug addict. He steals cars, writes hot checks and uses his father's credit cards without permission. He too cannot seem to hold a job. At 30 years old, one wonders who will take care of him ... as he is yet to take care of himself. The parents of these adult children are very sad about their children. They experience great pain and frustration. I would too.

Our sin grieves the Holy Spirit. But in a similar fashion, our children's sin grieves us. I find myself wondering if this is how God feels about my sin. It would seem that He made sacrifices to save His children, to provide for them and to bless them. So too we make sacrifices to have our children, raise them well, provide for them and give them blessed lives.

And there it is - the sin and failures of our adult children grieve us. And this is just like how our own sin and failures grieve our Father God. What an irony. And yet, something tells me that God's wisdom is at work in creating this irony for us.