Leading in Uganda

It started like an ordinary day. I was meeting the Executive Director of a ministry organization that I knew nothing about. We'd gotten introduced to each other at a school event several months ago. Out of the blue he e-mails me and says God told him to meet with me. I'm thinking, "Okay. Whatever." He was buying the breakfast, so what did I have to lose?

It turns out that this dear man has taken an abrupt turn in life. He left a successful career as a college professor to be trained at seminary. With a calling from God to equip pastors and other church leaders abroad, he founded Leadership Vistas (http://www.leadershipvistas.org/). This organization goes into economically challenged countries to train and equip ordained ministers to be great leaders. Imagine that, wanting strong leadership skills at the head of the local churches! How exciting!

So Leadership Vistas asks me to come to Uganda, Rwanda and the Republic of Congo to conduct five-day training seminars for pastors and other church leaders in the Presbyterian training center. They're running two workshops, in July and in October. They'd like me to come and do both. "Why me?" I ask. "Because God told me to seek you out." he says.

It seems that these pastors haven't been trained to talk about difficult subjects like incest, rape, pornography, masturbation, alcoholism, drug addiction, sexual addiction, conflict in churches, child abuse and other such topics. They went to seminary and learned about God and His Word. But the realities that their congregations live in require them to be adept at many other topics. So it's been determined --- apparently by God and some renowned Christian leaders --- that I am someone who can talk about difficult subjects rather well.

At first I'm perplexed. Certainly it's a flattering notion; a high honor. On the other hand, do I want to be known as someone who can talk about difficult subjects? Why do I know how? Is it because I am a difficult subject myself? It is because I have lived through difficult subjects in my life? Is it because God has uniquely equipped me like this? The truth is that I don't know. It may be all of those things or it may be none of them. Nevertheless, it may be that I am called by God to teach pastors in African countries how to talk about difficult subjects.

I'm praying through this now, trying to figure out if this really is of God, and if it really is His will for me. If so, then it would seem that my next task is to raise the money to go to Uganda. The first trip looks like it will have me flying into Kampala or Entebbe and traveling to the training center where I'd spend most of my time. Already, the head of chaplaincy for the Ugandan prison system would like to meet with me to talk about launching a Celebrate Recovery Inside program for the prison system throughout Uganda.

You know, part of me wants this to be God's will, because it sounds like an excellent adventure! But part of me is afraid that it will be God's will --- because it's intimidating, outside my comfort zone and hard. And then there's that part of me that hopes God will just say no, and everyone's notions about what God wants will have been wrong. I wonder which part is honoring God.

I don't know if you're supposed to do this on a blog, but if you're reading this before June 2007, please pray for me. Ask God to reveal His will for me. Ask Him to open or close doors in my life according to His will. And ask Him to give me clarity, clear vision, for the road(s) ahead. Thank you.